Sexologist Blog

BDSM

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BDSM is an acronym for Bondage Domination Sadism and Masochism. It is the catch phrase for erotic practices used for appeasement as part of foreplay. It involves various enactment like bondage, discipline, pain, dominance, submission and many more interpersonal dynamics that lead to kinky sex. BDSM may differ for people depending upon their personal choice of sexual pleasure.

What does Bondage, Domination, Sadism & Masochism mean?

Bondage.It is the act of tying a partner using ropes during intercourse. Not just the ropes, the dominant partner can control the counterpart using handcuffs, specialty hooks, velcro, clasps or the belts.

Domination.Playing the dominant one in foreplay. If the male takes the charge, the word for him is the dom and if the female takes up the charge, domme is the word. Ultimately, the dominant one controls the partner and the course of events. All regulations of BDSM are set by the dominant partner.

Sadism.Events that the dominant partner opts to gratify pleasure during foreplay by imposing pain to submissive.

Masochism.It refers to the enjoyment of physical or emotional pain and humiliation during intercourse.

Different Role-plays in BDSM

Under BDSM, the major roles are that of dominant and submissive. They can play their parts in different ways: -

Talking about Dominant

As in the above lines, the person taking control of the events during foreplay and intercourse is dominant. Interestingly there's a set of terms that follow dominance.

  • Master/Mistress:These terms are used to point the dominant partner who demands varying actions from the submissive to gratify pleasure. The master/mistress sets the rule and has the authority to treat the submissive as per their own will.
  • Daddy/Mummy:When the dominant chooses to play the parental role to the submissive, this term is used accordingly.

The dominant can use any way of gratification to enhance pleasure. They have the authority to include bondage (using tying or restricting materials) or sadism (inflicting pain) on submissive to entice pleasure.

Talking about Submissive

The partner playing submissive has to follow all the rules set by the dominant partner. The sub is not allowed to utter “No” to the orders of the dominant.

There a set of role plays that submissive performs: -

  • Slave:The term is self-explanatory. The submissive partner plays a slave to the dominant and has to obey each & every order. For the role of slave, chained collars are often common.
  • Brat:If the submissive fails to adhere to the orders of dominant or fails to fulfill the wishes, the sub is called a brat. Punishment of this misconduct is given by the dominant by imposing pain or other sexual actions.
  • Pet:The foreplay for which the submissive has to behave like a pet (kitty/pony/puppy) and is also treated as one by the dominant. Some sex props like cages, collars, tails, and leashes are often used.